I Have About 50 Years Left

I went to see my doctor today.
Anyone want a hot cup of pee?

Me and Hacksaw

Everyone has someone from their high school that "made it big" or is somewhat famous. My high school, which was Glens Falls high school located in upstate New York, can proudly say it's biggest celebrity is WWF superstar Jim "Hacksaw" Duggan. If you don't remember him, let me refresh your memory just in case the photo up top doesn't help. He was the one who'd wear the American flag over his shoulders, carry around a 2 x 4, yell "Hoooooo" from each corner of the ring and then give everyone the thumbs up followed by that weird face that reminded me of a constipated Snake Plisskin from ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK. Only Hacksaw didn't wear an eye patch...and he looks nothing like Kurt Russell. Okay, maybe he look a little like Kurt Russell...just a little. Sort of. Maybe.

I didn't know Hacksaw real well but I use to hang out with Hacksaw's nephew. We rode BMX bikes together and from time to time Hacksaw...or Jim as he liked to called when he wasn't being a WWF superstar, would show up while we were riding bikes and he'd say something like "hey boys..hows the bike riding". Then he'd charge us and put us in headlocks and then literally beat the living shit out of us. He didn't mean to beat the shit out of us. He was just having fun. But I think he'd forget that he wasn't "working" and just start shoving us around like we were trained professional wrestlers. No one ever got seriously hurt but I remember one time he knocked my Mountain Dew out of my hand and soda went into my eye. That sucked.

Before I go I'd like to mention that while I was typing this blog entry, some ass-fuck sitting next to me was playing a video game on his cell phone with the volume turned all the way up and it was driving me fucking crazy. It took everything I had to not say anything to him. I was this close (imagine my thumb and pointer finger barely touching) from pouring Mountain Dew into his eyes. Yeah, I was close.

DJ Milkdud at The Fuzebox

I have to admit that I'm pretty new when it comes to drum and bass DJ's....or any DJ's for that matter. Except for radio DJ's. But really...who cares about radio DJ's? They are usually really annoying and know absolutely nothing about the music they are spinning. At least that's the case with some of the radio personalities in my area...umm..Albany...Manchester,VT. Anyway, last night I went to see DJ Milkdud AKA Greg Mankes, who spins bass and drum at The Fuzebox in Albany, NY. I've seen him before and he puts on an amazing show. Last night was no different. To be honest the setting at The Fuzebox wasn't the best for a Milkdud show but it didn't matter. Milkdud spun a killer show and proved that he is one of the best drum and bass DJ's out there. But that's just my opinion. And really, what do I know? For years I thought all the unadopted puppies in the world were put on a special invisible island off the coast of Vancouver to live free forever and ever. Sadly, they are not.

If you get a chance check out some of his mixes on his myspace page by clicking here.

For more photos from the Fuzebox show click here.

Ham sandwich please

I've always thought that deli meats would be more fun to eat if they came in the shape of the animal they were made of. So with a little time, a pair of scissors, a steady hand and big slice of hickory smoked ham...presto! I've reinvented the ham sandwich. And maybe...just maybe, world peace will soon follow.

My friend Doc wears Crocs

Nothing says lame more than a pair of Orange Crocs. My friend Ally says it doesn't even matter WHAT color they are. Crocs are just lame in general and people wearing Crocs are even lamer. She's got a point. Why Doc? Why?

Speaking of music videos

Here's the video my old band DRYER did for the song DESPERATE ANNIES. Or DA's for you Saratoga Springs locals. It's sort of boring, but I think that was the whole point of the video..you know...life is boring until you go out drinking...which is...you know..sad.

I was in a music video back in the late 90's

Well, here it is. I haven't seen this in a long time but thanks to You Tube it has managed to pop it's ugly head back up...well, my ugly head. Back in the late 90's some friends of mine signed to a record label and put out a music video. They were/are called The Figgs and asked me and few other friends to come down and be a part of it. So we did. I think I was 21..maybe 22 at the time. My part...or should I say, my character in the video was simple. I play the guy who just wants to enjoy the show but I get into a fight with a fellow concert goer and then get thrown out for stage diving. And by the way, we were suppose to be "fake fighting" and my friend Todd actually punched me at one point. I think you can actually see him hit me if you slow it down. Oh, and wait till you see my hair. I had this Prince Valiant/bowl haircut thing going on. Trust me, you'll get a couple of seconds with nothing but my big round head. You can't miss it. Enjoy!

My face doesn't show up until midway of the video, so be patient.

Random tidbit of trivia: The guy I'm fighting is my friend Todd Strauss, younger brother of writer Neil Strauss.